Chapter 12 : ALTER

 

POV - Diana

'Tokk..tokk..' Diam.

Pintu bilik dibuka perlahan. Adam masih lagi terbaring tidak sedarkan diri di atas katil biliknya. Diana memeluk tubuh sambil bersandar di sebelah pintu yang terbuka. Entah apa yang bermain di kotak fikiran.

Rakaman cctv diulang tayang di kepalanya. Adam dengan santai mengajak Amber untuk turun makan pagi. Amber hanya mengikut gerak langkah Adam seakan ada sesuatu yang membuatkan alter itu kekal tenang disamping Adam. Kakinya ringan dihayun kearah katil Adam.

'Adakah Adam dapat mengawal alter Amber?' Matanya seakan bersinar kerana masih ada lagi peluang untuk dia sembuh.

*****

"Cik Diana....?" Adam terpisat-pisat melihat Diana disampingnya. Diana terjaga dari lamunan. Merah padam mukanya apabila ditenung oleh Adam.

"Er Encik Adam okay? Mak Jah ada sediakan makan malam" Dia bingkas bangun mengambil dulang diatas meja cermin sebelahnya.

"Eh takpe-takpe saya boleh ambil sendiri" Adam cuba bangun namun badannya masih terasa sengal-sengal badan.

"Badan Encik Adam masih lagi tak bermaya, saya suapkan ya" Diana cuba kekalkan riak wajah selamba. 

Allah sepanjang hidup tak pernah merasa disuap oleh mana-mana perempuan ajnabi selain mak aku sendiri. Gemuruh pula hati aku ni. Cik Diana ni pun lawa, level-level muka mix.

 Masing-masing sepi dari berkata. Tangan Diana lincah menyudu bubur ayam manakala Adam teragak-agak membuka mulut. Diana tayang poker face apabila melihat telinga Adam sudah merah.

"Boleh saya tanya awak sesuatu?" Suara gemersik Diana memecah keheningan antara mereka.

Adam jongket kening. Matanya dari tadi tunduk mengira bulu-bulu permaidani sebelah katil. Malu nak bertentang mata dengan Cik Diana.

"Boleh." 

"Kenapa awak peluk Amber?"

Adam tersedak. Diana segera mencapai gelas air lalu disua ke mulut Adam.

"Ehem, saya tak bermaksud apa-apa. Maaf jika tindakan refleks saya terhadap alter-alter buat cik Diana tak selesa."

Diana hanya diam tanpa reaksi. 'Emotionless betul pesakit aku ni' cetus Adam.

"Biasa waktu macam ni cik Diana akan buat aktiviti apa?" Dia cuba memancing perhatian Diana yang khusyuk dalam lamunan.

Tergaris senyuman nipis.

"Saya akan membaca dalam bilik bawah"

"Jom"

"Pergi mana?"

"Saya teman cik Diana membaca hari ni"

With love & Hakuna Matata,

Yaya Doe

I FOUND MY PEACE IN 2022

 

Hi, it's me again and again…how’s your 2022 life so far?

Before 2022 ends, macam biasa I’m going to do a few reflections from the past few months on the hardships, the challenges, and the gains in order for me to find peace.

I would describe 2022 as my ‘SABR YEAR’ or maybe ‘HEAL YEAR’ cliché duh but that was the truth.

Honestly, I went through a huge mental breakdown last year that’s why my first 22’ post was in June. HAHA

Jan-Feb-March

Throughout the first 3 months, I was a bit lost in my own space - where only work tasks & kdrama exist. I tend to avoid social events and would rather stay at home, being a Yaya-the-sleeping-beauty. PKP was demolished by gov so everyone was excited to plan the CNY holiday trip. 

At that moment, I asked my mama why not go food hunting at Kelantan and she said, " Yes, let’s go. She knew I was struggling with my own hardships (emotions) and not ready to open up about it. In early March, my family came to JB for a short vacation because one of my Lil brothers had to quarantine at my home after coming from SG. We went food hunting as usual. Nyums

At the end of march, I caught covid for 2^nd time. *sedihhh. This part yang aku lemah, sakit quarantine sorang2. Tapi Alhamdulilah, Allah masih lagi bagi another peluang for me to improve myself before the TIME really come. Semoga si Yaya Doe makin kuat.

April-May-June

Tough times - No one can make me believe that true love exists. Fight me. Because most of the time men fell first but women definitely fell harder and then they (men) stopped the chase and start their (men) freaking games. Am I the only one that hopeless in romance? HAHA – wow Yayaaa Duhhh is talking about love huh?

I’m was at the stage where I could hear all the lies that coming from everyone's mouths. However, this person taught me something without talking too much. Like I am a deaf person and he was a mute guy. Somehow his actions attracted my attention and mirrored all the attitudes that I was doing before this. WHO DA FISH R CHUUU. Is this a karmic or self-reflection thingy? I almost wanna cry bcos I was confused and overwhelmed when my anxiety came back stabbing my back without any warning. My hands start shaking again. Everything about that person was like a bunch of 1000 pieces of puzzles yang ada gambar Mecca tuuuuu. *aku agak je gambar mecca*. In my opinion, he tried to pull me out of my space by attracting me with some puzzles. HAHA, every single puzzle piece was so challenging.

I am good at reading people. Fact. But I cannot read this person. How comeeeee??????? Jatuh dari langit ke cik abang???? I just go with the flow dude, walaupun ada some people said if you go with the flow...you gonna flow like a dead fishhhhh in a dungeon tunnel. Yo I’m a walking dead already meh. Fav movie aku genre zombie. Maybe this one boleh jadi movie – Walking Dead in a Dungeon Tunnel and  I am the Tuan Director. So, I learned to upgrade my sabar thanks to Mr.Puzzle and I started doing my previous acah aesthetic healthy routine again.

July-Aug-Sept

In July, I learned that self-love is not selfish. I gain my own confidence and stop blaming myself for the past year's traumas.  Time will heal everything. In addition, I focus more on my value and tried to find what I love to do. Writing, Baking, Being Plant Mom, Cleaning, Home Workout and the rest is history. Worries less and think positively. My work became my number one priority because I had to take over another department under me and learn new things. Alhamdulilah. 

At first, I’m scared because it is one of the problematic departments with lots of work to solve. HUHU ingat girlssss not pain no gain. I need to trust myself and work harder to improve every single day. My shaky hands still going strong sis. LOLS. Also, I caught the flu after coming back from Ganu. Is it Demam Rindu? kuikui

Impian untuk menjadi girl boss with her own success biography book masih lagi ada jauh terpendam nun dihati sana. Or maybe I can switch to impian kedua - be a pilates mommy- after hantar anak pergi daycare- singgah starbies & jaya grocer sebab balik nanti nak masak sesedap for her workaholic husbb. Ouch. Last option, aku boleh jadi General Officer Strategi Pertahanan Negara jaga sempadan Malaysia-Thailand or Laut China Selatan. Jauhh dah tu merapunyaaaa

 

Oct-Nov-Dec

In October, I went back hometown again to celebrate my mum's birthday. Last year I prayed, if  I fully recover from sickness, I will balik kampong every 1-2 months. So this year basically I selalu balik Terengganu. *watch out what you pray girlsss. Selalu doa yang baik-baik tau.

Furthermore, I caught covid for 3rd time in early Nov. HAHA. Joke on me. Out of nowhere, Mr. Puzzle also caught covid19. AT THE SAME TIME as me! Is it a sign or just a funny coincidence? 

Besides, I had a MITI exam a week later and Alhamdulillah I passed the exam of Certified Exporter for ATIGA. Apart from this, I had to go back to Ganu in Nov due to GE15, and this time I took a bus. That was my first ever experience mengundi since the last PRU14 I was stuck in UTHM due to FYP. Aku undi siapa? syhhh #undiiturahsia. Hopefully, this time our new government would be clean of corruption, pollution, economic growth and etc

In December, Sam took me to the Batu Layar Desaru for healing camping. Kah I really need that! Early morning dah gerak and as usual I masak mee goreng basah & keropok. Unfortunately, the next day I got eye allergies maybe bcos terciduk air laottt *mengade tauu . 2 weeks tak boleh pakai softlens and it getting worse since this girl degil nak jugak pakai makeup. At the end, I got MC 3 days bcos eye infections for both eyes. Ughhhh.  I had to go through the worst-ever experience with an allergy. Certain parts of my body felt so itchy and had rashes. What a day.  Mr. Puzzle wants to meet me but sadly we are both busy with our schedules and I am still not in a good state. 

 Walaupun this year I selalu sakit, 

NO PAIN NO GAIN.

Heal. Mission complete. I found my peace! - How I wish I can end the year with it. :’(

 With love & Hakuna Matata,

Yaya Doe

CAUGHT COVID FOR THE 3RD TIME

 Haluuuuu. *still breathing smoothly & elegantly*

How's everything? Is it fine? Because I’m not fine! HUHU

I tested positive again! The last time I caught covid was 6 months ago. In my opinion, all the jabs that we had were not that immune tho.

This thingy definitely changes over time and becomes a mutation. Cheeky little thing.

Let's throwback how my day went for the past few days ago. Standby air sebotol bcos this gonna be loooong story. Okih Dear Diary YayaDoe~

 

Wednesday 021122

The first day, I went to work after taking some meds. However, I felt fatigued all day at the office, and all my colleagues asked me to go home if I’m not feeling okie. This girl was so freaking degil acah workaholic, ughh. I felt something wrong with my body.

And at the same time tak mau pergi clinic bcos idk what to sayyyy to abang doctor. Tak fever. Tak batuk. Tak selsema. I lemau the whole day. *nak MC free lerrr tu bisik abg-doc*

I got 0 energy to entertain anyone. In the evening, I dah space out level naik langit ayohh pingg. Balik kerja terus pecut borong meds, cool fever, 100 plus & roti. Malam aku demam 38.0  shoot meh

 

Thursday 031122

At first I just want to go clinic bcos yeah…demam beshe2 je ni. Then tergerak hati nak swab sendiri. *bangga woi pandai swab dah sekarang*

GI-LA tak sampai 30 seconds terus positive double line.  I told my boss & HR and they asked me to quarantine until everything is okie. Basically, aku melepet the whole day bcos demam, batuk,selsema, sakit sendi & migraine menyerang. The funniest thing, I was hungry af sampai dalam kepala pikir nak makan macam2. Lepastu redha terpaksa makan roti for 7 days sebab tak boleh keluar & LOM GAJI SHE-TAN! HAHA

Makan roti pon berat sama je tak turun. Peninggg tol

 

Friday 041122

I woke up at 2am. Mengigil seram sejuk. Kepala nak hantuk dekat dinding. Melepet tunggu anyone tolong ambil ubat and air atas meja. Ughh bcos I’m tired af.

Tak larat nak bangun ke dapur. But gagahkan diri bcos I live alone. Hmmm

When you got sick, baru feeling sendu MAK NAK KAWINN.

Masa sihat aku acah alpha-female-freakin’-independent-girl. Pui

Takkan aku decide nak tamatkan zaman bujang bcos I need a husbby to ambilkan water on a table?????

Plus he needs to pergi beli extra meds at 3 am bcos his wife so manjahh bila kena covid for the 3rd time! HAHA

Yaya Doe talking about marriage now???? Wuuu

People change…perhaps hijrah kearah yang lebih baik? Who knows

However, l teringat…I have SAM! Sorry susahkan sam belikan meds. I only told her I wanted cool fever, flu & fever meds but this girl kannnnn….

Orang pesan beli 3 barang dia beli 10 barang ya! 1 plastik besaqqq naaa

Ni yang aku malehhh…serba salah sebab sam selalu tak mau amik duit aku. Hmmmm

Ilebiu sam

 

Saturday 051122

Alhamdulillah, makin sihat makin bertenaga makin padu makin mantap. Allah

Tidur lena gila lepas tampal cool fever dekat  dahi. Mimpi indah-indah. Phews~

Only mild cough & migraine. Demam pun dah kebah. Masuk hari ke 4 baru terhegeh nak minum air cuka kurma. Rahsia glowing.

My days were filled with a reading diary of wimpy kids, al mathurat, laundry, talking to indoor plants, and re-heat frozen donuts. HAHA

I off my phone bcos today everyone was not working but my mama freaked out. She called me so many times. But I’m unreachable. She was already on standby to heret my ayah to JB at any moment. In case her fav daughter pengsan depan peti ais masa nak keluarkan frozen donut. LOL

 

Sunday 061122

Everything is fine af. I do deep cleaning today. Semua celah ceruk rumah aku sental.

Eventho penat and energy still 50% but aku oki. I need to do home cleaning baru mental aku completely recover. Rindu nak  pergi groceries but lom GAJI YA ALLAH.

Apsal la lambat sangat masuk nya. HAHAHA *hidup makan gaji* cemni la.

Doakan YAYA DOE jadi girlboss one day nanti. Insya Allah.

So being caught covid for 3^rd time, buatkan aku lebih kuat & makin kurang expectation aku to others. Only letak sepenuh harapan dekat Sang Pencipta.

Berharap dekat manusia kita akan kecewa tapi jika berharap dekat THE ONE & ONLY SANG PENCIPTA kita akan tenang.

Lantak la orang nak cakap aku acah baik or islamik, but at the end of the day only HIM can save us all.

 

With love & Hakuna Matata,

Yaya Doe

DAY TRIP TO KLUANG BY TRAIN

25062022

Pehh. Posing taknak kalah ya post kali ni.

Suppz guys, Sihat ke idok?

I'm still alive don't worry. Sementara menunggu cik abg jodoh yang masih sesat ditelan waktu jom kita ngopi di Kluang.

Yeah I took a train to Kluang just to ngopi and I grab my bestie - SAMMY with meh HAHA

Last 2 weeks I was super stressed with work and needed a short gateway. So I booked train tix in Easybook apps. One way tix around RM13 je. Two ways hang kira la sendiri. Aku malehh

Wahhh, ni first time aku naik kereta api lama since Ganu tak ada benda alah ni. Sobs.

Punya la stress nak cari stesen Kempas Baru sebab tersorok dalam kampong. Ingat kan sempat singgah brekpes but nope, Sammy taknak singgah bekpes guys! Dia ghisau kena tinggal train. Aku lapar terok.

8.50am dah gerak from Kempas Baru. Masa dah dalam train, aku buat muka lapar. Sammy tolong beli roti & air dekat cafe dalam train. Member terciduk terox roti gardenia RM1.20 naik harga sampai RM4. Amik mung aku ajok bekpes dulu takmoh.

As usual, si Yaya Doe over feeling aesthetic dok membaca dalam train sambil layan lagu DON'T STOP BELIEVING. Sam dekat depan tidur.Kah

Tak sempat rasa bosan, eh dah sampai Kluang around 10.40am. 

First stop, harus isi perut dulu. Ingat nak makan dekat Railway Kluang Coffee but the que too long. Aku malehh.HAHA

So we went to Restoran NSM aka Nasi Daun Pisang. Don't worry the owner Indian-Muslim. The food sooo good guys. Untuk dua orang makan only cost us RM23. Mahal ke murah? idk

Next! Lepas dah kenyang lunch kitorang jalan-jalan area Laman Seni Kluang aka KLUANG STREET ART. Banyak sangat lorong-lorong seni yang korang boleh singgah untuk ambil gambar posing acah-acah tourist. Sam cakap phone memory dia full dengan muka aku je.

KLUANG-Next-Top Model ? HUHU

Tengah panas terik jalan-jalan mula la haus. Bcos sammy mengidam cendol, sempat singgah cendol viral sebelah laman seni kluang. 

Nak try Kluang railway coffee dekat train station tapi tak mampu nak beratur lama-lama. HAHA

So I just went to their other branch area Bandar Kluang. Itu pun tunggu around 10 mins baru dapat meja. You guys kena try their Kopi Ais + roti bun bakar. Ughh heaven.

                                         

Alaa daytrip kalini rasa kejap amat.  Lets get back to work.

 

TAMAN NEGARA TG PIAI #JOHORCLEANUP

Assalamualaikum.

Bertemu kembali kita dalam sesi merapu with YayaDoe.

    Last month aku suka-dipaksa-rela untuk involve in Johor Clean Up at Taman Negara Tg Piai.

Since aku kerja in Plastic Manufacturing and my company had Ocean Bound Plastic project. So, as a role model aku harus pupuk semangat Cintakan Alam Sekitar dalam diri sendiri. Kah

     Kiranya ni first time aku sampai Tg Piai aka The southest point of mainland asia  GITU 

Eventho dah 7 years stay Johor tapi masih lagi keliru jalan area Johor.

Spot mehh. haha

Pukul 5 pagi dah gerak dari Pasir Gudang. Barai. Collegues ajak borak pon aku tak mampu nk layan. Dah hanyut dalam mimpi tak berhujung.

After registration, we got a booklet, t-shirt & foodie. The clean-up session started at 8am but we arrived early. So apa lagi playing-tourist ler.

Guys the rubbish is aaaa LOT. Way too much than we expected. Dekat luar tak nampak tau but after masuk dalam area kayu bakau. Amik kau. Segala nenek moyang sampah ada. Since Tg Piai ni di tengah2 antara 3 Negara - Malaysia/SG/Indonesia so fikir la sendiri ni sampah siapa yang sangkut. Sila Claim. Garunk

Rip white shoes. HAHA 

After 2-3 hours of struggle in paya bakau-trekking sambil geleng kepala tengok gelagat masing-masing yang first time kutip sampah dalam paya bakau.

On the way balik kami singgah ngopi dekat Kopi Tenggek. Kopi dia padu wei. Keropok lekor pon dap emm. Menyesal beli 2 pax je. HUHU.

Hakuna Matata,

Yaya Doe :)

 

CAUGHT COVID-19 AGAIN :'(

 

230322

Hey-o peeps.

Jyeah I got covid again >..< But this time my symptoms are quite mild and I only take 3-4 days to recover compared to the previous one. I still had to quarantine for 7 days and at the same time, I lose weight again. HUHU

Masa ni telan ubat pun malas. *kalo supplement cantik lajuu je* 

Aww~ My Virgo Bestie sent me fresh roses to cheer me up. Thank you. Muah

 Atototo~ I need a filter to cover up my muka benyaii. HAHA Bye

Stay safe

Hakuna Matata,

Yaya Doe :)

FOOD HUNTING : TRIP TO KELANTAN

 

010222

Hi everyone, kita bertemu lagi dalam sesi jalan-jalan sambil melantak with me :p

Sebenarnya trip ni aku dah pergi waktu CNY bulan Feb tapi baru sempat untuk update. *eleh update awal2 bukan ada orang baca pon. KAH

Day 1

AKOK POK LONG

Last aku pergi kelantan waktu arwah Abah ada lagi.sobs Tak silap masa tu baru umur 13-14 y/o. Now dah umur 26 bhai. Trip kalini kitorg satu family fokus makan je and on the way to Pengkalan Kubor ada nampak signboar AKOK POK LONG sebesar alam. So harus singgah beli ya~ Dekat situ pun ada banyak kuih-kuih kelantan yang iolls tak pernah makan. Akok dia serius sedap 9/10. 

ETOK SALAI

Korang boleh nampak disepanjang jalan ada orang jual etok salai. So aku paksa ayah aku singgah beli. Kena la cuba! Walaupun tak pandai makan etok. Ada pelbagai jenis - original-tomyam-kari-blackppper *choose your fav guys* Etok ni adik beradik sepupu sepapat kerang/lala/remis. Tak silap satu bekas kecil RM3/Besar RM5. Tapi aku give up bila makan etok...susah nak bukak. Better makan kalau kuku korang panjang kot baru senang nak bukak. Orang yang tak sabar macam aku memang out. At the end kemam je dari luar.HAHA. Rate 3/10 *sebab takpandai bukak cengkerang dia* sorry kelantanese people. im noob sobs

DUTY FREE ZONE

Syurga mak-mak bila datang Pengkalan Kubor - Pinggan mangkuk-terbang melayang

Tapi aku excited nak borong all sorts of chocolate. Harga masih lagi terkawal tapi tak la semurah Langkawi. I think we spent RM300 for chocolate and the rest idk. Dekat sini kami tak makan sebab masih kenyang makan akok & etok.luls

LUNCH : NASI ULAM CIKGU

Lepas balik dari Pengkalan Kubor terus gerak hotel. Aku booking area bandar Kota Bharu sebab situ banyak tempat-tempat best. Waktu tengahari sebelum check in singgah makan dekat Restoran Nasi Ulam Cikgu. Sesuai kalau datang dgn mak-ayah sebab mostly lauk-lauk kampung. nyums

Banyak pilihan makanan - ulam-ulam, ikan bakar, singgang, budu wajibss. HAHA

Total spent tak sampai RM50 untuk 6 org makan. murah2

Dekat sebelah restoran ada muzium kraftangan so lepas makan jalan-jalan ambil gambar & beli souvenirs.

DAY 2

After checkout terus cari port Nasi Kerabu femes. But trust me semua tempat beratur panjang. Aku beratur 2-3 hours semataa nak makan nasi kerabu kelantan. Wakaf che yeh pun jammed teruk bhai 2 jam sangkut. Menduga kesabaran tau trip ke kelantan sebab holidays season semua full house. So kedai-kedai viral semua penuh. Lepas dah penat beratur takda mood dah nak makan sbb perut masuk angin. Bahahaha.

Letsgo back

Hakuna Matata,

Yaya Doe :)

2022 - NEW YEAR RESOLUTIONS

 

is it too late for this?HAHA.

Hi everyone, how's 2022 so far? Good or Nay? For me, January felt so long, exhausted, and sleepy. I had my booster shot in mid-Jan and so far don't have any serious side effects only sleepy. Alhamdulillah. 

But unfortunately 1 week after that I got shoulder pain due to overwork.HAHA. So guys please take care of yourself bcos we have a long way to go. Anyway, I just want to share a few of my new year resolution. let's get started:

1. Back on track. 52KGS - Current weight 58KGs  (6KGS more babehh)

2. Saving money for VACATION *South Korea*

3. GATEWAY CHECKLIST 2022. To remarks on my 26th year of being alive.

4. Get Glow Girl *invest in good skincare & makeup*

5. Be Happy :)

Hakuna Matata,

Yaya Doe :)